It's My Moon Party & I'll Cry If I Want To...

I usually try to update my resume every now and then just in case I get an urge to upgrade my life (yes, I suffer from acute Greener Pastures Syndrome). I don't want to be caught slipping and let a good opportunity pass me by while I'm performing major cosmetic surgery on my resume. 

So it's that time again. I have my eye on a new position that I'm abundantly qualified for and it's my life's passion. Two pluses, right?

After cleaning up my resume, I emailed it to my mom - aka Ms. Resume Doctor - for her objective opinion. She called me a short while later and...let's just say that she did not follow the compliment-criticize-compliment rule. She immediately went in for the kill without any preamble, warm-up or warning. As she rattled off the things that she would fix, I asked her to pause so I could start writing them down.  Once I had pen and paper in my hand, she decided to change tactics and condense her...suggestions.  Perhaps her Moon in Pisces antennae finally picked up on my lack of participation in the conversation. She then backtracked and pointed out the parts that she liked. But all I was hearing was the first 10 minutes of our conversation.

Note to critics who aren't trying to destroy their interpersonal relationships: NEVER start out with the criticism first.  Ironically, she is the one who taught me this golden rule of dishing out constructive criticism that you actually want someone to absorb in a positive way, rather than sticking their head in the nearest oven.

After we hung up, I found a quiet spot where I could be alone and immediately started crying. Even though I knew the source of my tears, they still shocked the juice out of me. One minute I was taking it all in as if she was talking about someone else (hey Gemini-ruled 7th house of Other) and then...I don't usually spontaneously cry like this over criticism, especially not when I'm braced to receive the criticism.

Crying times call for desperate measures, though. So I did something else I rarely do - checked out the transits to my natal chart.

Here's what I found:

Challenging/Conflict

Helpful/Flowing

Transit Sun, Moon, Mercury & Chiron in Aquarius squaring natal 12H Moon in Scorpio
Transit Mercury in Aquarius opposed natal 8H Mercury in Leo
Transit Mars in Leo conjunct natal 8H Mercury & Jupiter in Leo
Transit Mars in Leo sextile natal 6/7H Mars in Gemini
Transit Venus, Jupiter in Pisces trine natal 8H Sun in Cancer & 7H Venus in Gemini

Transit Venus, Jupiter in Pisces opposing natal 9H Saturn in Virgo

Transit Venus, Jupiter in Pisces squaring natal Asc in Sagittarius

Transit Moon, Mercury, Mars & Saturn softly aspecting Asc in Sagittarius

We can easily plug her into these aspect patterns above, right?

This is a clear case of me seeking external opinions (Venus, Sun, Mercury & Jupiter in 7/8H) from a credible, yet critical expert (Saturn in Virgo 9H), unrealistically expecting praise or soft criticism (Mercury in Leo) but meeting up against my mom's emotionally-detached, yet personal opposition of my ideas (shots fired from transit Aquarius and Leo @ natal Leo & Scorpio).

I'm feeling like the way I'm presenting myself (Asc) was attacked...in a deceptively soft way (Venus and Jupiter squaring Asc in Sagittarius). It took me at least 5 minutes to realize I had been wounded (transit Chiron in Aquarius tightly squaring natal Moon in Scorpio). Woman down! It doesn't help matters that transit Neptune is in my 3rd house of communication and natal Neptune is in my 1st house of identity. While my resume was being picked apart, I did some of my most creative doodling to date.

Almost all of these transit planets/stars mentioned above - Sun, Moon, Venus, Jupiter, Chiron, Neptune - are moving through my 3rd house.  With Virgo and Sagittarius in the pattern, the criticism is useful and enthusiastically given, but it's all doled out in a very matter of fact, blunt way.

Which proved to be too, too much for me. As we can see, my Moon, Mercury and Mars are getting attacked from many different angles in the Battle of the Fixed Signs.

Meanwhile, transit Uranus is in my 4th house of MOTHER, emotional security and roots. Transit Uranus in Pisces is tightly trine my natal 12th Moon-Uranus in Scorpio, reinforcing my feeling that she electrocuted my subconscious which caused this flow of emotion. Right now, I'm feeling particularly sensitive and fearful of trying out a different path...

Queue me crying and feeling confused about why this banal exchange is resulting in my tears.

Just three short hours ago, I was laughing my ass off at a comedy show with wickedly politically incorrect humor (transit Aquarius softly aspecting natal Sagittarius) and now I'm crying???

I quickly invited me to a pity party and allowed myself a good "whyyyy meeee?" cry for about 5-10 minutes because you know this incident blossomed into a full-fledged "no one understands me!" breakdown. After feeling sorry for myself a couple more minutes, I figured that it would be more productive to examine why I'm feeling so attacked and sensitive...and then write my feelings away (Venus & Jupiter in Pisces trine Sun in Cancer & Venus in Gemini).

Taking a look at my chart and writing this post has sufficiently dried my tears.

It's times like these that I'm thankful for astrology.

I can rely on more than vague faith to tell me that this, too, shall pass.

BONUS: Check out these celebrities with Moon in Scorpio. Do they look like crybabies to you?

Some real crocodile tears: